c'est ma vie

life

2008-06-16T00:13:00.003+08:00

hmm.. what should i say.. I have been really fortunate from the start. My supervisor is someone I know since JC because I went there for a short attachment and he remembers my friend and I fondly. He calls us watergoose and flyingfish. =) He went all out to make me feel at home at his lab.The staff there are also really nice. Never failing to help me if they can. Also I am so fortunate to have a place to sit and access to usage of their computers. Felt so fortunate.. good fortune. Of course there are downs too like what life is. Frustrations, sadness and all. But this makes life interesting isn't it? Struggle happily=)

I think I am not working as hard as my peers.. I do not do my FYP after I leave my lab.. and I leave there early too as compared to them. cos my lab close at latest 6.30pm. It's good but I just feel I am not working as hard as them. Go at my own pace ba=)　

National Day Parade practices are great! though the spirit is still not there yet.. I am sure we will be in the highest life condition and our performance will be able to touch the lives of every single individual watching us! Everyone can definitely feel the Gakkai spirit!

はい！

Lost of focus

2008-05-26T12:08:00.003+08:00

Been feeling somewhat down in spirit these days.. so many things is happenning.. currently, almost my entire family is sick(i have been a super spreader and spread the virus efficiently to everyone at home except one of my sis cos she always outside.) FYP going slowly, partly because I was sick and cant do anything.. Translation proj is really difficult, there are words that I simply dont know how to translate, but fret not, we work as a team! Help is always there=) I dunno why I seem to feel in a daze these days, maybe because I am still recovering from the high fever bouts..rest.. Haven had a good laugh these days.. Jia you I can pull through this period! Daimoku!!I can defeat the sansho shimas trying to block my progress!

2008-04-30T15:56:00.002+08:00

Hi everyone! Really sorry I didnt have the time, or should I say I dont feel like writing? But, now I am writing one.. at the persistence of Nobuko. ha.. so let's thank her that finally a new post is written.

Hmm.. Another sem has passed. The last one in NTU! How was it? hmm.. totemo isogashii!! It just zoom past and now I cant really remembered much about what has happened. Exams went great! i truely enjoyed the exam period this time, though it was really stressful. However, with all my beloved comrades encouraging me, I managed to pull through and enjoyed it! Exam daimokukai..going down to jurong kaikan almost everyday.. I am going to miss it.. my last exam dmkk is this fri. :(

Everything seems like the last now. Since last year I have been feeling so.. last birthday celebration with hh, last cny here, last this last that. Argh.. Sometimes, because of this, I would get somewhat depressed.. leaving Singapore, is what I always want to.. but, when I really am leaving here soon, I realy feel that I dont bear to leave. All my friends.. comrades are here. How much I will miss them if I go over. And not to mention my family too. It's 2 years.. short or long? I may stay there longer than 2 years(dont think about that 1st). But I really want to go there too! Want to learn as much as I can there and gain the skills to treat ppl. So, u can see the mixed feelings I have. Life there will be a challenge too! However, I will take up those challenges and train myself thoroughly there! Await a different Yu Fei when I am back! stronger, wiser i hope!

Practicing will be tough in China. Meetings have to be held secretly..as it cant be done officially. I have always wondered why is such law still in place? Why? When most of the top leaders of China know SGI, know Sensei and recgonise the efforts we have made. Sensei has met so many of them and they are all great friends,late Premier Zhou En lai, developed friendships with many top Chinese leaders, including Vice Premier Deng Xiaoping, President Jiang Zemin, and President Hu Jintao, and so on.. Sensei is really widely recognised and respected in China, as he has built the bridge of friendship between China and Japan. But why? Why do we still have to practice our faith secretly? Maybe because of the deep set emotions towards the World War 2 has not changed. I have heard from my teacher that he will never treat patients from Japan. He has received invitations to go to Japan to treat the patients there. But he firmly refused. As he said that Japan has not officially apologise to what they have done during the War. I know this kind of thinking cant be changed overnight, and they have the right to think like this too. On regards to this, I have read into the Rape of Nanjing and realised that the soldiers are forced and being turned into killing machines by the war. War changes everything, people's mind and actions. Like what Sensei wrote in the opening of Human Revolution:"Nothing is more barbarous than war, nothing more miserable." Why do wars exist? I shall write more of my thoughts about this in my next post.

Back to what I was saying about the difficulty to practice in China. But, I am not deterred. I will strive on to polish myself and grow stronger with each passing day I spend there. Really want to contribute to China's kosen rufu too! Had made a vow about that too. Will do my best!

Nobuko, Harumi, Toshiko have all left Singapore. I miss u all a lot.. pls take care! and jia you!! Love you all. Really want to fly over to Japan now.. with so many final years going soon and I have to do my Final Year Proj. boo hoo.. ha. I will definitely get the chance too! Hope by then I can speak Japanese well enough to communicate with u all! =)

Right now, I have taken up the challenge to join NDP and do my FYP at the same time. Though i know it's really not going to be easy but..i know i can!! I must win in this and show actual proof! Really want to!

ja..I am going off. stay tuned! to yufei's channel.. FM 22.2! matane!

21st bday!

2007-12-13T00:45:00.000+08:00

My 21st bday! oh no.. am i officially an adult? yes i am. 21 is still a young adult. correct? according to what i know, 30 years old is still considered youth in Europe. Went to jb with my beloved coursemates to celebrate yu chii and my bday! We went to Red box to sing! haha.. my 1st time gg for karaoke. hmm.. no so..was forced to sing at karaoke session when I was young. Horrible experience. hah

Actually, I was feeling sick in the morning..nose like a running tap.. running all through from home to jb. hah.. what a waste of water. Cant help it:( anyway, I finally managed to stop the flow and can enjoy singing le!

THanks my friends and comrades for the wonderful memories I hav with u all! THanks! I will cherish those memories de! I will strive even harder in this year to create many more victories! Let's ganbatte together!!

reviving my blog

2007-11-27T22:13:00.000+08:00

hi all!
many people keep complaining I　never update my blog. Was too busy or should I say I was too lazy to update? But I was really busy! Ha.. Whatever the reason, I am finally taking steps to revive my blog!! think all of you are cheering! yay!

What should I start off with? hmm.. let me think back. Yes! After my 伤寒论 exam and concert, a brand new module awaits me, 金匮要略. Thinking back now, this subject is really hard. We just dont know how to study for exam. For the mid term test, I did not know how to study for it, and in the end, I whipped up stories and blauff my way through. Really expect that I would fail for that paper but I did not！My teacher is really my shoten zenjin. She didnt want to fail me and talked to me abt the test after I got back my paper. THanks!

After the test, lab reports, and exam soon came! So fast! The exam this semester I really enjoyed it. This was my 1st time I stayed in sch during the exam period.Everyday timetable during exam period was: morning 7.15am morning gongyo at pj's room, 8.30am at oasis/lib. lunch, back to studies, dinner, exam dmkk at scc,lib then back to room. It was enjoyable and as I was always in accompany of NTUSD comrades! =)thks for all the encouragements!

Now, my last hols in singapore!(cos may-aug'08 doing fyp)Let's have the most fulfilling hols ever!

Surviving through tough times and gaining victories!!

2007-10-01T23:08:00.000+08:00

Finally!! My SO concert is over and my 《伤寒论》exam is over! I have managed to survive through this tough and challenging period!I have gone through ups and downs in this journey(coincidentally, the SO concert is named Journey'07). It's like going through a roller coaster ride where my mood goes down and up at all angles(0-360 degrees). It has been tough coping with orchestra practs 3 times a week and every night in the week leading to the concert. As, I have cope with all this on top of my studies for my exam which is a day after the concert. Thoughts of giving up crossed my mind tons of times and I am glad I have not given up and stayed on till the end!

Thanks to all my comrades and friends who made this ordeal more bearable. Thinking back I am not sure how it will turn out without your encouragements! I kept telling myself that I need to win and I must win no matter how tough the going might be..It's because I want to share this experience and want to win for all of you and Sensei! And also I want to do my human revolution and get rid of the fundamental darkness es in me, never to be let myself pulled back by them!

One of the many guidances that kept me going
"No matter how painful or disagreeable your situation may be, I want you to live through it and triumph over it.Please bear firmly in mind that this is the proper path for a human being" Sensei

Through this I am firmly convinced and will strive on on this path to create even more victories in all aspects of my life! =)

NTU String Orchestra!!spot me =)

My viola section..missing a guy who went missing after the concert.ha

yu chun, me, wan jing:)

sad.. many friends cant go.. but anyway I imagined u were all there! THanks for the moral support!

Go GO!!!

2007-08-18T15:22:00.000+08:00

It's been so long since i last wrote sth here.. just returned from intership, feeling so tired now. So many of my friends sufferin from 肝气郁结（闷闷不乐。。）stress.. sometimes i feel so too. but stress is like a double edged sword.It can be good n bad. Too much stress is bad, too little, we have no motivation n drive. And in between,we will be fine..N tt's e tough part. Balance

School just started 2 weeks ago. A new challenge n struggle. But i noe i must n will win! Nth to say much.. wait for my victory report after my exam right after my SO concert! 1st time performin in orch..:) make it the best before i leave NTU this year! so fast.. yr 3 le

Go go go! jia you! all of us! strive to have many many victory reports! yay!

"One thing is certain: That is that the power of belief, the power of thought, will move reality in the direction of what we believe and conceive of it. If you really believe you can do something, you can. That is a fact."
sensei

Ganbatte!

Busy

2007-06-26T00:43:00.000+08:00

so busy nowadays.. MILK run, SSA　40th anniversary，HEARTS, jap,... so many things! Really sorry to my friends, keep changing date for meetups. sorry wj. really wanted to meet u for dinner when u asked me to. :( feel so bad. but i will find time de.. i cant possibly be busy till i dun hav time to meet u for dinner right? i still have to eat. =) 加油my dear friend!

but anyway.. i enjoyed being busy!ha.. it is so fulfilling! =)

People who come to your aid in a time of personal crisis are people of genuine compassion and courage. More often than not, people will try to act as though nothing is wrong. Others are either afraid or refuse to get involved, and quietly drift away. ----Sensei

I will strive to be a true friend to all my friends! jia you my friends! take care! I will never neglect you all de!:)

Le Fantôme de l'Opéra

2007-05-21T19:28:00.000+08:00

C'est bravo! c'est parfait! It's worth every cent I paid for! This is the reward for myself after struggling and perserving in the exams! The change of scenes were truly impressive! I like the scene where the phantom caused the chandelier to crash on the stage floor! In fact, I love every single moment!

I am so glad that I made it to the esplanade theater just a min before the musical starts! phew! Started running from my home til I finally reach the door of the theatre! Actually, from macritchie..long story..

the poster

Myself with the poster..too bad I cant take a photo with the cast

high!

2007-05-19T14:25:00.000+08:00

hee.. feeling so high! Being a MC is so fun! hope I did a great job! still have a lot to improve on! forgive my horrible English..n stammering..I don't speak English frequently, I speak in mandarin most of the time. great meeting! =）enjoying hols so far! busy but fulfilling!

Sayonara

2007-05-18T00:57:00.000+08:00

Sayonara to all my beloved japanese friends!!
The feeling of missing them is slowly crawling into my heart..Took so long to..I didn't really feel anything at the airport. I just felt very happy n kept smiling n laughing throughout the entire farewell.

Memories start to replay themselves in my mind unconsciously. Like morning and evening gongyos at si hui's room with kumi n ruri..studying with kumi in hall 9 study room, ruri falling ill, e kenshu skit dance,hiroki coming for morn n evening gongyo at my room,......much much more.. haiz.. will treasure these memories! Miss u all!!

All the best to all of u! 加油！take care! I am definitely looking forward to meeting u all again!

Kumi and I ,ruri behind(didnt manage to take a photo with ruri)hmm..waiting for the group photo to be uploaded..

Determination n Gratitude

2007-05-12T20:27:00.001+08:00

hi everyone!
thanks for visitin my blog! This is my very 1st entry! Why do I want to start a blog? I have always viewed blogs as an utter waste of time but I am now writing a blog entry! What an irony! Actually, I started one so as to share some of my thoughts, a channel to release my emotions when I am down, my struggles...(e list just goes on..) ha!

Had been really stressed out durin string orchestra pract today.. i simply cant play..my lack of practice just shows itself durin e pract.. horrible！But right now, I am determined to win in this tough challenge! Merci beaucoup to my comrades! I will strive on no matter how hard the road to victory might be! Await my victory report!

I feel so fortunate to have a group of comrades fighting alongside with me! esp Hui Hsien! Thanks a lot! U r always there for me! 加油together! :) if not for all of u.. I might not be bounce back from my low life state so quickly! Merci!!!!

Youth is a time of struggles, only thru overcoming them can we truely grow! Let's build a strong foundation so we can build great structures on it! 大家一起加油！Victory will be ours at e end!
Sensei's quote:
青春就是与烦恼的纠葛。在这当中，一面争扎，一面拨开乌云，迎向太阳、不断前进。

Nothing is impossible, only if we think it is, it will be. I will fulfill my mission to my very best of my ability (>100%), unleash my innate potential! 加油！:)